Pets: Should you allow your dog on the bed? The answer depends on the pet's overall behavior

Julia Levitt | Contributor

When a client asks me if thedog can sleep on their bed, I answer back with a question: Does your dog pee on the bed? While my question may surprise some of you, peeing on the bed is a symptom of other undesired behaviors going on in the house. So if they answer "no," my answer is, “Yes, let your dog sleep on the bed.”

But if your dog is aggressive, or dominant, or suffers from anxiety, the answer is not so simple. I would say “No. For now…”

Here’s why: If a dog is in charge of your house (in other words, in charge of you), elevating a dog to a higher physical place — while it means nothing to you — means a lot to a dog. When a dog is at the same level as a human, in the dog’s mind it is very powerful. In a dog’s mind they are equal to a human.

Many people might comment that “It’s okay for my dog to be on equal footing with me.”

To look at this from a dog’s point of view, it is helpful to understand that dogs are hierarchal. Yes dogs observe status within a group of dogs. There is always a leader. The leader gets to eat first — gets the first of everything. This is understood in dog lingo.

The leader is not the most aggressive bullying dog, and it can also be a very small dog. Minus a pack of dogs (e.g., in a home) — dogs assume the pack mentality with members of the family, and humans become part of their pack. They are hardwired this way.

In my latest puppy class, this was played out much to the surprise of the class members. Within seconds, four of the puppies began to play and roughhouse with each other. The fifth puppy calmly walked into class. It neither looked nor interacted with the other puppies.

“Pippa” calmly walked into the room and, as if by magic, all of the other puppies parted to let Pippa pass. Pippa calmly walked around the room . She neither sniffed nor engaged with the other playing pups. They all deferred to Pippa. It was instantaneous.

When I pointed this out to the class, they were amazed. This is the power of energy and body language.